Duplication Disaster
by pingo1387
Summary: A run-in with a monster on the hill leads to a bigger problem than expected.


**Here's another 24-hour fic! Written hastily based heavily on a subplot from Paper Mario TTYD.**

 **Also I have a poll up on my profile! Please take a look**

* * *

"And that's the situation," the village elder finished. He bowed his head. "You look very strong. Won't you help us?"

"So, some kind of monster lives in the steeple on the hill," Nami said.

"And villagers here are being turned one by one into pigs," Zoro said.

"And you think it's the work of the monster," Usopp said.

"And you want us to help?" Luffy finished.

"Yes!" the village elder exclaimed. "It won't be long before every one of us is rolling in the mud!"

"I mean, I'm sorry about that," Luffy said. "But what's in it for us?"

"We have a bit of gold we could offer you," the village elder said, taken aback. "And perhaps some food, or other supplies, free of charge?"

"That sounds good," Nami agreed, eyes already gleaming at the mention of money. "Luffy, go beat up this monster quick!"

"Come with me!" Luffy said indignantly. "You're the one who wants the money! I'm just doing it for the food!"

"Do I have to come?" Usopp asked. "I mean, free supplies would be nice, but a monster sounds—"

" _There_ you guys are!"

Luffy, Zoro, Nami, and Usopp looked up as Chopper burst into the tiny room.

"I was with Franky on the ship," he cried, "and all of a sudden he turned into a pig!"

The Strawhats stood.

"That settles it," Zoro said. "Let's go get that monster."

"Chopper, do you know where the others are, besides Franky?" Nami asked.

"Sanji's with Franky, and Brook and Robin are in a bookstore," Chopper said, catching his breath.

"Let's go get the others, for backup," Usopp said, gulping. "Chopper, we'll explain on the way!"

"Thank you!" the village elder exclaimed, just before there was a puff of smoke, leaving behind a pink, squealing pig.

* * *

"So I'll stay on the ship with Franky," Chopper said when everyone had gathered at Sunny, Franky the blue pig snorting at their heels, "and you guys go take care of that monster!"

Everyone nodded. Luffy gave the signal and they ran for the hill where the steeple rested.

"Um," Chopper said, sitting by Franky. "Can you understand me?"

Franky ignored him. Chopper sighed and patted his head.

* * *

The journey to the steeple was tough—the forest was thick and untraversed, not to mention chilly, and it was uphill the entire way. Usopp jumped at every clawlike branch and clung to Zoro the whole time.

But at last, the group stood in front of the door to the old steeple, a sign hanging above it.

" _To enter, one must have their name written upon their body,"_ Robin read aloud.

"What kind of rule is that?" Zoro said, raising an eyebrow.

Nami took out a pen and wrote her name on her palm. "There's mine," she said. She handed the pen to Usopp. "Hurry up."

"Um . . ."

They turned to Robin, who had entered the building with no problems.

"I think whoever made that rule did it as a prank," she announced.

Nami blushed and took the pen back from Usopp. Luffy just laughed and hurried inside. "Come on, then!"

They walked down an eerie corridor, the building dank and dark and rank with mold.

"Or, perhaps," Robin said, "whoever doesn't have their name written on them will perish from a curse."

"Nami, if I die, make sure everyone knows how brave I was," Usopp wailed, clinging to her arm as Brook screamed.

"Well, if we all die except Nami, that's just fate," Zoro said.

"Zoro- _san_ , please," Brook exclaimed.

"I'm sure we'll all be fine," Sanji said. "But, Nami- _san_ , you're so wise, taking every possible precau—"

"Hey, what if this monster turns us all into pigs when we're fighting it?" Luffy wondered aloud as the group started walking up spiral stairs. "What then?"

"Guess we'll bite it?" Zoro said. "What do pigs do?"

"I don't want to be a pig!" Nami exclaimed, clinging to Usopp. "Be my shield!"

"How can I shield you from a curse?!" he cried. "Curses go around and through things! Wasn't Franky inside when he got transformed?!"

"The door's locked," Luffy said. Usopp and Nami bumped into Zoro and everyone looked up at the tall door. They had reached the end of the spiral staircase.

"Could we need this?" Zoro asked, pulling out a key.

"Where'd you get that?" Robin asked, taking it from him and inserting it into the lock.

"Saw it on the floor earlier."

"Good eye."

The door swung open, and they came face-to-face with a very strange being.

"Visitors?" it (or he, judging by the voice, high-pitched as it was) exclaimed, leaping from a cushy armchair. His body was covered by a white sheet with a silly face drawn on the front like a Halloween costume, and oddly a conical hat rested on his head.

Nami, Usopp, and Brook shrieked.

"A ghost!" Brook cried, backing up.

"It's gonna eat us!" Usopp wailed.

"That's not what ghosts do!" Nami snapped. "He's gonna _curse_ us!"

"Say, all of you, just get to the point!" the thing said impatiently. "I was resting!"

"Is this your bedroom?" Sanji asked. The room did indeed look very cozy.

"Never mind that," Luffy said. "Are you the guy who's been turning everyone into pigs?"

"Yep," the thing said. He giggled. "It's just for fun, you know?"

"Turn everyone back right now and maybe we won't beat you up," Zoro said, drawing a sword.

The thing looked around at them. "Hm . . . nope. Don't feel like it."

"Then we're fighting," Luffy announced, and everyone dove in, taking it in turns to attack the monster. The ghost thing had some good kicks and punches, but soon he was reeling where he stood.

"Now, now, just wait," he said, wheezing. "I have a trick up my sleeve!"

He waggled his arms under the sheet, and with a puff of smoke, transformed into—

"Nami- _san!"_ Sanji exclaimed. He looked at their own Nami, staring at the creature in disgust. "Two Nami- _sans!_ My day is made!"

"How about that?" the creature said proudly, still in his own voice. "Duplication! Ever seen that before?"

"Yeah," Zoro said. "And if you think taking on the appearance of a friend is gonna stop us, you're sadly mistaken."

"We do know you're not our Nami- _san_ ," Brook added, gesturing to the real Nami behind him. "That's an interesting ability, but it won't stop us from defeating you."

"You don't understand," the creature insisted. "When I do this, I get all the person's fighting ability!"

It drew out the Clima Tact and spun it. "Now, come at me!"

But with expert speed and agility, thunderous attacks were dodged and the creature, once more, was left swaying where he stood.

"This . . . isn't over," he gasped. He fell to his knees. "Or . . . maybe it is!"

The figure of Nami dissolved, leaving behind a barely discernable shadow figure lying on the floor. The Nami among the Strawhats jumped in surprise.

"We did it?" Sanji said, coming forward (for he had refused to fight the creature).

" _We_ did," Usopp said, throwing him an annoyed glance. "Geez, did that thing really think taking on Nami's looks would stop us?"

"I hope you don't take offense, Nami," Robin said with a smile.

"None at all," Nami said firmly. She put away her Clima Tact.

"Well, come on, let's see if the curse is gone," Luffy said, turning around. "And if it is, we get food!"

The others cheered and followed him out.

* * *

Several minutes passed before Nami woke up.

She pushed herself up from the floor of the cozy room where they had found the creature. She looked around, confused, and shook her head. Standing, she looked at her hands and flinched—they were mere shadows, and if they hadn't been attached to her equally shadowy body, she wouldn't have known they were hers.

Nami gulped and hurried out of the room. She had to find the others.

* * *

"Thanks so much, old guy!" Luffy said through another mouthful of food.

"Oh, no, thank you for saving us," the village elder insisted. He looked around at the Strawhats munching down on the small feast. "This is the least we can do . . ."

"I still dunno what happened," Franky said, scratching his head.

"I _told_ you—never mind," Chopper said. "Where'd Nami go?"

"Bathroom," Usopp said, tearing into a spicy chicken wing.

* * *

"Hey, little lady!"

Nami froze and drew out her smoky Clima Tact, giving a hostile glare (though her shadowy features were invisible against the rest of her face) to her own body approaching her with a smirk. No one was in the alleyway but them.

"Have you figured it out yet?" her body, her own voice, went on. "As soon as you and your friends defeated me, I stole your body. Normally I can just replicate someone . . . but to _really_ be someone, I have to take their body _and_ name! Good girl, listening to that sign outside the door."

Nami tried to yell, but found she could not speak.

"Oh, and since I have your body, I have your voice," the creature added. "The best part? If your friends see you like that, they won't know you at all! Can't use your name if you don't have one, right?"

Nami came at the creature with the Clima Tact, but though her strike was head-on, the shadow version went right through her body's head.

"No, no, no," the creature said, shaking its (Nami's) head. "You can't hurt me when I'm this powerful, and when you're like that. But this doesn't seem very fair to you. I'll give you a sporting chance, little lady. If you guess my real name and tell me—oh, you can't use your voice—well, write it down three times on a piece of paper and give it to me. If you can do that, maybe you'll have a chance at beating me!"

The creature turned around. "So long, little lady, I have a party to get back to."

Nami stared after it and fell to her knees. Something had to be done. Something . . .

* * *

In her shadowy body, Nami did not feel much, and that night she was able to sleep outside in the town without catching cold. She woke the next morning and crept to the edge of a house, peering around the corner to the Sunny. The crew was waking, too, and soon enough several dispersed throughout the town, including Nami's imposter. Judging by that, the only ones still on the ship were Robin, Chopper, Zoro, and Sanji.

Then, her only chance would be . . .

Nami pressed herself low to the ground and crawled to the ship stealthily. She leapt onto the railing, landing lightly, and tiptoed around walls to the door she sought. Sanji, who rested against the opposite railing, looking out to sea, thankfully heard nothing.

Chopper, in his office, heard a soft knock, and went to answer it. When he saw the shadowy figure before him, he screamed, and Nami tumbled inside and pressed a hand to his mouth. As his eyes filled with fearful tears, she pressed a finger to her lips and slowly removed her hand.

"Wh—What do you want?" Chopper whimpered.

Nami gestured to her throat.

"You can't talk?"

Nami nodded and pointed to the desk. Chopper, staring at her warily the whole time, jumped up to his chair and grabbed a pen and paper, setting them out. Nami straightened up and began to write.

 _I need your help._

"Help with what?" Chopper whispered. "Who are you?"

 _I'm_

Nami frowned and tried to make her hand write the characters she needed.

 _My name is_

She sighed.

 _My name and body were stolen from me,_ she wrote. _My voice, too. I'm a friend, Chopper. Please help._

"Your _name_ and _body?!"_ Chopper exclaimed. "How does that happen?!"

 _I don't know, but I need your help. And don't tell anyone else._

"I . . . okay, I'll help," Chopper said bravely. "Why can't I tell anyone?"

 _They'll think I'm an enemy because I look like this._

"Oh, you do look scary," Chopper agreed. "Got it. Okay. What do we do?"

 _The one who stole my identity told me that if I can find out his real name and write it three times, I can defeat him. I don't have any idea where to start._

"Hm . . . I'll ask Robin, she might know," Chopper said. He nodded at Nami's gesturing. "I won't tell her! I promise! It's our secret, mystery person!"

Nami clasped her hands together in thanks and sat on the bed, waiting as Chopper hurried out the door.

* * *

"Robin?"

"Yes?" Robin said, looking up from her writings.

"Um . . ." Chopper shifted. "How do you find out someone's name if they won't tell you what it is?"

Robin smiled. "I suppose . . . that depends. You could start by looking at their possessions or where they live. People often put their name on their things, or have it on their door."

"Oh! Good idea, thanks!"

Chopper ran up the ladder. Robin stared after him, amused, before returning to her studies.

* * *

"So do you know where to go?" Chopper finished.

 _I have an idea. Follow me. We'll sneak away._

"Okay!" Chopper said, eyes shining at the prospect of having a secret adventure.

Nami led Chopper away from the ship, keeping a lookout for wandering eyes. When they were out of sight, she broke into a brisk walk, leading him up the shady hill she had traversed with the others yesterday.

"Um," Chopper whispered, shying away from the eerie flora. "Are you sure we're going the right way?"

Nami nodded and picked him up, holding him close to her in comfort.

"You feel familiar," Chopper said, leaning against her shoulder. "Who are you?"

Nami rested her head on his and continued walking. It wasn't long before they stood in front of the steeple.

"'Must have their name written on' . . . should I do that?" Chopper asked. Nami shook her head and set him down, leading him inside. She brought him up to the still-unlocked door, letting him stick close to her legs, and pushed it open.

The room was empty. Nami and Chopper looked at each other and moved to different corners, searching for something, anything with any clue to the monster's name—but even after turning the room upside-down, their efforts were fruitless.

"Maybe somewhere else in this building?" Chopper suggested. Nami nodded and they left the room, heading down the staircase. As they went back down the corridor, Chopper tripped. Nami hurried back to help him up, and he looked back at where he'd fallen.

"Is this . . . ?" He knelt and scrabbled at the floor. With Nami helping, they uncovered a trapdoor with a ladder going into the darkness. Chopper gulped and reached out for Nami again; she held him with one arm as she dropped onto the ladder, climbing oh-so-carefully.

By feeling around, she found a short hallway, and was forced to crawl forward with Chopper. They came upon a tiny room, barely lit by light filtering in from a grate above them. The room had nothing in it but a parrot resting on a perch and a tiny box.

Nami and Chopper glanced at each other.

"Um, excuse me," Chopper said to the parrot. "We're looking for the name of someone who lives here. Can you help us?"

"Polly wanna cracker!" the parrot squawked. "Good girl? Polly wanna cracker!"

Nami tapped Chopper's shoulder, waved goodbye to the bird, and crawled back into the short hallway, hiding Chopper behind her shadowy body.

And when a minute had passed, the bird spoke again.

"They're gone . . . I guess," she sighed. "So they want to know Rumpel's name? Good luck! He told me he cursed the thing in this box, so if he ever took anyone's body, they wouldn't be able to write his name unless they touched this! I just wish I had a better job than guarding this . . ."

Nami and Chopper tumbled out of the hallway. Nami tackled the bird while Chopper seized the box and threw it to the floor, breaking it open without need for a key. Nami pushed the grate in the ceiling open and let the bird fly out.

"Thank you!" the bird cried, flying away.

"Here," Chopper said, handing Nami a scrap of paper. Nami felt a shiver run through her and studied it: The letter L, written hastily.

"So the thing's name is Rumpel?" Chopper said. Nami nodded. "Great! Then all we have to do is find him and you can defeat him!"

Nami nodded. She gave Chopper a boost up through the grate and then leapt up herself, accepting his helping hand. They were outside behind the steeple and hurried back down the hill.

* * *

No sooner had they agreed to split up in town to look for the monster (Nami could not describe the appearance, of course) when a familiar voice behind Nami said, "Hey, little lady!"

Nami whipped around to see her imposter approaching again.

"Your friends all seem convinced I'm you," he said, smiling. "Maybe I'll just take your place entirely and leave you here. Then again, if you've guessed my name, there's nothing I can do!"

Mocking her, he drew out a pen and paper with a flourish and presented them. "Go on! Write it!"

Nami glared at her body and wrote _Rumpel, Rumpel, Rumpel_ with such ferocity the paper nearly ripped. The moment she showed the name to its namesake, the color in his cheeks drained.

"No . . . no," Rumpel whispered. "No, no, no, _no! How?!_ You shouldn't have been able to—! _No!"_

Nami whipped out her Clima Tact and smacked Rumpel in the shoulder. This time it connected, and Rumpel stumbled. But the look of horror on his (Nami's) face was quickly replaced by one of cunning. He screamed and turned heel, running in the direction of the harbor.

"What happened?" Chopper exclaimed, running up a moment later. "Did you find him?"

Nami nodded and pointed. Chopper followed her.

* * *

"Guys!" Rumpel exclaimed, bursting in on lunchtime. "That guy from the steeple's back!"

"What?!" Luffy exclaimed, jumping up.

Rumpel nodded fearfully. "I'm sorry I didn't fight him, he startled me!"

"Is he coming here?" Zoro asked. Rumpel nodded again and led everyone outside, where Nami and Chopper had just boarded the ship.

"You wanna fight again?" Sanji said. "Chopper, why are you with that guy?"

"It's okay," Chopper said as Nami glared at Rumpel. "They're friendly! I'm helping them!"

"Chopper, that's the thing we fought in the steeple," Robin said. "The one who cast the pig curse."

"What?" Chopper whispered, looking at Nami, who shook her head.

"This is the guy?" Franky said, confused.

"It is indeed," Brook said, drawing his sword. "Chopper- _san_ , I'm afraid you were duped."

Chopper backed away from Nami, who knelt, reaching out to him. "You tricked me?! After you were so nice and everything!" His eyes filled with tears. "You jerk!"

"It's okay," Rumpel said, throwing a sneaky smile to Nami. "Come here before he does anything to you."

Chopper ran to the Strawhats, clinging to Robin and glaring at Nami. Nami balled her fists and stood, facing the group.

"Either leave or we'll fight," Zoro threatened, readying his swords.

Nami shook her head and drew out her weapon, charging for Rumpel, but Sanji blocked her, kicking away her weapon so it skittered across the deck.

"Why would you go straight for her?" he snapped. "Some man you are. And you still have that weird shadow form instead of your usual weird self?"

Nami shoved him aside and went for Rumpel again, who blocked her with her own Clima Tact. Nami seized it and used it to push Rumpel to the deck, but this time it was Luffy who blocked her.

"Why are you going after _me?"_ Rumpel cried, frowning. "I didn't do anything to you! No more than anyone else here, anyway!"

"Hey, Sanji," Chopper said, still hiding behind Robin as Luffy kept Nami away from Rumpel. "What do you mean, weird shadow form?"

"The guy was a freak-in-a-sheet in the beginning of the fight," Sanji explained, helping Rumpel up from the deck. "And then he made himself look like Nami- _san_ to try to stop us from fighting."

"Yeah, and the only one he stopped was the cook," Zoro added, grabbing Nami in a headlock. She struggled and slapped and pinched him but he wouldn't let go.

" _Anyway,_ after we beat him up, he changed into this shadow form here," Sanji finished, gesturing to Nami.

Chopper frowned. "He . . . made himself look like Nami," he repeated. "And . . . did you ever find out the enemy's name?"

"No," Usopp said. "Why? Hey, ghost man, what _is_ your name?"

Nami pointed to Rumpel.

"Are you still pretending to be me?" Rumpel exclaimed, indignant. "Of all the—!"

"Chopper," Robin said. "You said you were helping him. What did he need help with?"

"They said they were a friend," Chopper said, staring pensively at Nami. "And they couldn't tell me their name, because their name and body were stolen from them."

"Some kind of elaborate trick," Rumpel interrupted even as Zoro, Robin, and Franky stared at him with suspicion. "I guess he thought the raccoon out of everyone would be the most trusting. He used you, Chopper."

Zoro released Nami from the headlock and she looked at him in surprise.

"Go get him," he said, gesturing to Rumpel.

"Excuse me—hey!" Rumpel exclaimed indignantly. "Zoro, why—?!"

"Hey, fake Nami?" Luffy said. "Chopper's a reindeer."

Sanji backed away from Rumpel as he looked around sheepishly. "Oh . . . slip of the tongue. Sorry—"

Nami tackled him. Everyone backed off, wincing, as she pummelled her own body over and over, held down by her weight and Robin's helping hands.

At last, when her body was covered in bruises and lying still, the true form of Rumpel in the sheet reappeared beneath her. She stood, puffs of smoke covering her until her own body was hers once more, still bruised and bleeding in places.

"It was just a prank, little lady," Rumpel whispered from the deck. "Just a prank. I promise. Please leave me alone."

"My name is Nami," Nami hissed. "Go to hell."

She ripped away his sheet. To her shock, there was nothing beneath, and the sheet fell limply to the deck.

"That was weird," Zoro said at last.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, my dear," Sanji cried. "How could I ever mistake you for another?"

Nami pushed him away and knelt to hug Chopper. "Thanks for listening."

"You're back!" he exclaimed, beginning to cry again.

"Are you okay?" Luffy asked. "Sorry we didn't know."

"I'm fine," Nami said. "I just wish he hadn't given me back these injuries, too."

"I'll give you some ointment," Chopper offered. She nodded and stood, following him to his office.

"That was a clever trick," Zoro remarked, picking up the sheet and throwing it overboard.

"Wait!" Usopp exclaimed. "So, when did he switch himself with Nami? When he turned into the shadow version?"

"Probably, yes," Brook said thoughtfully.

"And what _was_ he?!"

"A demon," Robin said.

"A kitsune," Zoro suggested.

"No, he would've turned into a fox," Sanji argued. "Whatever he was, he's gone. If you'll excuse me, I need to make my Nami- _san_ some snacks."

"Get me some, too," Luffy called after him.

"Nami- _san_ comes first!"


End file.
